21 Jun 2016, Mojave Spaceport, Nevada (near Beatty, NV)
Associated Press
Elon Musk and Thomas Swift IV stunned the aerospace industry today when they announced that Project Odyssey’s Argos 7, humankind’s first manned spacecraft capable of utilizing the Star Gate, would launch from the Mojave Spaceport at 20:18 on 20 July 2016. After last year’s successful test flight of the Argos 6 unmanned craft, which became the first manmade craft to successfully leave and return to the the Solar System via the alien interstellar portal left behind in the wake of the 2002 alien Invasion, it was assumed that a manned flight would follow; but experts had predicted that it would be at least two years before such an attempt could be made.
Musk and Swift offered no explanation for the short time frame between the announcement and the launch, but sources close to the project have suggested that Russia’s own secrecy-shrouded attempt at utilizing the interstellar gateway, which remains under UN control under the auspices of SHADOW, may be closer to completion than previously believed. If so, a desire to beat the Russians to the stars may have prompted the accelerated launch date. Musk downplayed such speculation, instead emphasizing the fact that the launch date and time honors the 47th anniversary of the first moon landing.
After his initial announcement, Swift dropped a second bombshell with the revelation that the flight crew for this historic voyage would consist primarily of a single family. He then introduced Captain Darnell Eastman, 29, a USAF pilot and NASA astronaut, who will pilot the spacecraft. He then brought out the crew, whom he referred to as “the Space Family Ulysses.” The leader of the expedition will be Dr. Jason Ulysses, 48, an acclaimed astrophysicist specializing in applied planetary geology and a long-time professor at M.I.T.
Second in command will be his wife Dr. Melinda Ulysses, 46, a traumatic injuries specialist at Massachusetts General Hospital and a leading biochemistry researcher. Their oldest child, Dr. Cassandra Ulysses, 25, has dual degrees in biology and xenobiology from Bensalem University, while 19-year-old Susan Ulysses recently completed undergraduate work in zoology at UC San Diego. The youngest member of the crew, Theodore “Tad” Ulysses, is a 16-year-old prodigy in the fields of electronics and computer technology.
Dr. Zebulon Jones, a NASA flight surgeon and expert on the psychology of humans in space, spoke briefly about the batteries of tests the Ulysses family has endured to ensure that they are “the right fit” for what is expected to be a year-long exploration of the Alpha Centauri star system, our nearest stellar neighbor. Afterward his presentation each member of the trailblazing family briefly answered questions, before the Argos 7 itself was unveiled, although few specifics about the vessel were actually given.
Project Odyssey is a joint venture of NASA, the Tesla Corporation, Swift Industries, Virgin Galactic, and AzTech. The first joint space venture between the government and private space industry, it is hoped that a successful voyage beyond our own star system, even if utilizing alien technology, will lead to recognition by other star-faring civilizations of Earth as a full galactic citizen. The ambassador to Earth from the Union of Confederated Worlds could not immediately be reached for comment…
CLIPPING ADDENDUM: I still think Musk was crazy to give this mission to a family, and I have no idea how he talked NASA and the others into it. But not much to be done about it when you’re not in charge…